Didnt feel like blogging coz I've got so so so much to complain. Too much till I dont even know how to start and how to go about complaining. I think maybe its my fate to be unlucky and everything. I dont owe him anything, I dont deserve the treatment i get now. Waiting for 1 last month is just a stupid excuse, a stupid thing to do. Just a simple question to a friend and he wun even reply. So wads the point? I dont see any future in us anymore, I don see the point of holding on to someone who is trying hard to get away from you. I once used my faith to get this fate back to me. But fate has once again choosen to leave me. No point using my faith to get it back when I know it will still leave me eventually. Maybe it sounds confusing, but this is how i feel and I believe whats yours will eventually be yours. For now I just want to concentrate more on my studies and work. I will get back the confidence that i lost when I was with him. When I'm determined to give up, you do things to pull me back. But when I'm back, you pushed me away. I really dont understand your point. Anyway went drinking with yink, nat, the 2 Vs and shenglong last night. Felt so much better when I get high and cry it all out. For whoever is worried, dont be. I didnt get myself drunk. =)

To "you" who have been helping all along: Thanks for everything you've done but i think your efforts will go to watse. I donno if whatever u said to me before is true, but if it is, he will come back. However seriously speaking, I'm really negative about this and I really have a strong feeling things will never turn out right anymore. Maybe he loves you more than he loves me and he's just using me to forget you. Maybe he has been playing around with me all the time, and I wont want to be made use like this.

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